You would have thought that after all the struggles and discrimination women have faced over the years there would be a sense of sisterhood in the lesbian community…
No. Within this group, which has also fought against hatred and expulsion from society, we still find discrimination.
We all know how hard it is approaching someone who we find attractive. Its made even harder if we know that our intentions might be interpreted in the wrong way.
Approaching a butch as a butch yourself you’re often met with “alright mate” and other neutral greetings and friendly chatter rather than the preferred spicy flirting. Your intentions are misinterpreted and you are instantly relegated to the dreaded friend-zone rather than a potential partner.
Some people can work through this barrier , however it is very difficult , and sometimes, simply impossible if the other woman is into femmes.
It’s almost the same as the hurdle gay women face in straight clubs / non gay establishments eg: coffee shops etc. Seeing someone you’re attracted to and making the move, unsure of whether they even “swing that way”. Dating minefields!
That’s what relationships are all about at the end of the day. Taking a chance, making yourself vulnerable, feeling that thrill of the unknown. Yes it can be heartbreaking. It can tear your world apart. But if you don’t take that chance you’ll never know.
It takes an inordinate amount of courage for gay people to “come out” ….we need to harness this courage and keep it with us through out our lives. Be it fighting for equal marriage or something simple as approaching the person you fancy regardless of gay relationship stereotypes.